Between the presents

We have a ritual that we do to set the tone when we begin a play session.  He tells me to "present" and I am to kneel, adjust my posture to his specifications, and take a moment to settle myself, both mentally and physically.  I also ask to serve him.  It is the trigger that starts everything.  We also end each session the same way, with me presenting and thanking him for allowing me to serve him.  So, "between the presents" means our play sessions.

Just when I ground myself with all the reasons to put some emotional distance between us, T decides its time to rachet things up a little.  He really gets it that I need the D/s.  So, he has decided that we need to include more structure/rules during our play sessions, or "between the presents."  I, of course, am all over that.

It began with the last session.  It was extremely difficult.  It is getting harder and harder for me to turn it off when we are not playing.  Since we hadn't played in a couple of weeks, I was not in the "submissive" mindset very well.  Things were definately "turned off".  Because of that, I made lots of mistakes, which is so frustrating for me, the perfectionist.

The next day, we discussed how it went.  He seems to really be getting into the control aspect and was ok with all my mistakes.  His attitude is that it's ok as long as I'm trying.  He made a comment that really grabbed my attention.  He said that "between the presents, I own your ass.  No more hiding, no hiding anything."

Oh. my. God.

Statements like that make me feel the inner-slave I thought was dead and buried start to stir.  And it scares me to death.  But, things are so good, so right, I can't resist him.  Just like a moth with a flame, I may go down in flames, but it is worth the risk.